A Mama's Heart

You remember this young man? The kid down the street in our old neighborhood with 8 million toys and dogs?

Well, once we moved a few city blocks over, it was understandable that we have pretty much lost touch.

I say "pretty much" because the boys did invite him over a few times, and he had accepted and come over for a few afternoons and dinners. It was good to see him again, and notice that although they all have grown a bit, the kids still got along great.

Lately, though, Action Man's phone calls have gone unreturned, and my Mama instinct figured that that friendship has been decidedly ended. After all, the kiddo is now in Junior High. Little Love's antics probably weren't that much of a draw... (and yet the antics of young-ins are exactly what a moody teenager needs... I know from experience!)

And then, news about our young friend came to my reluctant Mama ears. Turns out his family has moved. The mom and boys are staying with her parents, while the dad is living elsewhere.

And our oh-so-young friend? Was seen in an alley with an older boy presumably doing drugs.

My Mama heart just broke.

This kid had promise. Although... DH and I always suspected something about this family, but never could put our finger on it. I was always looking for clues or signs, since the relationships just seemed "off." Not seeing anything concrete, I decided to just "be there" for this kid, in any way I could. He would chat with me about his family and extended family, but there was never any hint of anything awry.

He was a troublemaker at school, I was told by a teacher I happen to know. She was astonished I let my kids play with him. I told her there were boundaries, and the play was always at our home... but there hadn't been a remote peep of anything inappropriate, ever. In fact, the letter he wrote to our kids when we moved was amazing. He exhorted Action Man to take care of his "beautiful family" and he told the boys they were his "best friends ever."

This could have ended differently. I know it's not over, but this whole path could have been avoided. I'm angry and saddened. I'm not sure exactly who I am angry with, but the sadness is overwhelming.

This young man had promise.

I pray that he finds hope and peace... and comes to know the depth and the love of a Mama's heart.

Always a Need...

As I pound out short fiction stories for my "other" lucrative (in other ways) employment, I am brought back to the real world with a reminder about this couple. They are new-to-me virtual friends, our shared interest being only the occasional post over at DFW Catholic.

But their story is inspiring. And the ending has not been written yet.

At least not the one known by us. Little Vivian has been born, and is hanging in there. Please keep this family close to your heart. They are spending precious moments with their little angel right now. And they do not know how long they have.

No matter how many short stories I write, where the endings are filled with hope, all tied up neatly in a big puffy bow... I welcome my limitations and remain in awe of the real stories, all tied up in reality and written by a Master's hand.

*updated to add* Precious Vivian Marie was called home at 5am this morning. Her family had a beautiful 16 hours with her. Please pray for them.

My Baby Turns 5 Today!

And I promise I'm not crying about it.... well, not too much anyway.

:)















I just adore this picture of Little Boo holding Little Love...



In all seriousness, how could I be sad?
When remarking to Little Love yesterday that she is not a baby any more, that she is getting so big and lovely....
She replied quite wisely and in her seriously lispy way:

Of course I am, Mama!

And then she skipped away.




















So, that's what we're about today. Skipping about and issuing wise proclamations on the passage of life.

And playing Barbies and eating lots of chocolate cake with pink icing.


My Little Love delights and amazes us daily with her quick intellect and funny sayings. As the youngest, she definitely sees the need to make her wishes known... often quite loudly. (We are working on this.)
















We are so blessed to have this littlest one in our lives.

Today I am going to revel in God's wonder and wisdom.

:)

Only Five

Only five, I answer the woman, apologetically
as she peels and chops tomatoes, her life swirling around her.
Her children are numerous, and they run and dance
as she laughs and brushes them away.

Only five, I answer hesitantly as the woman bristles in dismay.
Her glance disdains a life ill-lived
and her coldness clucks at her tongue
as the icicles stab further into her own unloved heart.

Only five, I whisper to my Maker
agony and pain clenching my heart.
He holds me up and begs me to see
to fix my eyes on Him and trust His plans.

Only five, I sob to my friend
the dearest to me in the world.
She takes my hands and honors me
with a share in the life of one of her own...

to hold and protect, to pray for and love with.
She points to my heart, reveals the love and the care
for those far and those underfoot and near
showing me how very full and so very rich
only five can be.

Because Margaret Asked....

This is where I was that day.


May our tears and prayers never run dry.

Why I Read These Guys...

Because you have to appreciate excellent political humor. A rarity these days.

Enjoy.

:)

More on Deliberate Pruning...

To nail a virtue means rediscovering one solid square foot of Reality. The idea that work can sanctify wasn't original to St. Benedict, but the way he said it helped make Western Christendom a healthier, holier place. If we think of our work as a prayer, we can find ourselves fulfilled by digging a ditch, and digging it as well as ever we can. Likewise in answering e-mails, baking casseroles, bathing squirming toddlers who accidentally urinate in one's face -- and even, though the blood drains from my face as I say it, in grading student essays. Any work that isn't a sin (liturgists, I mean you) can serve to sanctify.

Well worth the read here.

:)

My Heart's At Home Daybook... Long Weekend Edition

I realize I'm a day late on this. But I am "in between" writing assignments and want to work on something creative and fun. Easy, light and refreshing... with some recent pictures thrown in.

:)

Outside my window...

Hot and sticky... still. Summer lasts forever here. I love the sun and the warmth, but wish the humidity would go. away.

I am listening to...

The quiet. Little Love and Little Boo are at their Montessori school this morning. Today is their first "full" morning. They have a beautiful, gentle, inspiring teacher. And many many friends. It's such a blessing for them.

To live the liturgy...

I'm hoping to get to adoration this week.

To be fit and happy...

I'm running! Every other day, for the past 2 weeks I've dragged my sorry arse around our neighborhood, coaxing a half-way decent workout from my old tired lungs. My motivation? Washing my hair. Yup, I'm easy that way. I've decided that I will wash my hair only if I've had my run. Since my hair is insanely long (for me, anyway) it's a motivation that works. I still do my morning stretches and back exercises. So far so good.

I'm thankful for...

My IRL friendships and my family. They all keep me grounded, and remind me what is important. There are so many needs right here, right now. There is so much nurturing to be done... it can be overwhelming. Lots of prayers, listening, cooking and just be-ing.

I am pondering...

How much is too much? This applies to everything if you think about it. More on this another time.

From the kitchen...

Chicken parmesan and home made bread. I'm whipping myself into shape with menu planning. No slacking allowed.

I am wearing...

Low-rise jean shorts, white tank, orange crocs, and pony tail. I feel young and active. Even while nursing an 11 yr old with the stomach bug... :)

I am creating...

A peace-filled household. Ironically, I've decided that toeing a hard line and keeping standards high will eliminate a lot of the undesirable behavior that has cropped up this summer. So initially our household will be a bit of a high stress situation for me. But the long term effect is worth the effort.

On my ipod...

New stuff, specifically him and him. Nice and mellow. Not my running music... obviously. :)

Towards a real education...

Making the best of our curriculum. Adding living history and read a louds, trying to talk talk talk about what we are learning.

I am thinking...

One day at a time.. one step at a time. God has His plans, I just need to follow. Slowly and deliberately.

In the garden...

The tomato plants are gone, done their duty for the summer. I'm waiting to chat with my neighbor about plans for the fall. My "who-be-jigs" out front are wilting, and I need to re-plant before our crazy company-filled October begins.

Around the house...

Construction. Master bath and bedroom will be redone and redecorated. All the plans are in my head, much to my husband's chagrin. :) He's awesomely handy and very patient. We're a great team.

I am reading...

Nothing. (kind of nice... I admit) But my book club starts up next week. Have to get on the ball!

I am hoping and praying...

Lots going on in my extended family and my friends' lives. It weighs on the heart and mind.

On keeping home...

I always answer this under "I am creating" ... funny, isn't it? My home is my masterpiece, I guess. And I suppose that's how it should be.

One of my favorite things...

A healthy meal. Since my return to fitness, I've been more conscious of good food choices. Lots of salads mean more in my repertoire... more ingredients, new dressings, etc. It's been fun for me, and the kids have responded well.

A few plans for the rest of the week...

Maintaining consistency. That's it. That's my goal. I need to start small and keep a firm hold on things. Blossoms come from pruning, right?


:)

Clarification

Little Love: Mo-o-om! Where is the thingy-ma-jig?

Me: The what?

Little Love: The Thingy. MA. JIG!!!

Me: I'm not sure what...

Little Love: Oh! Oh no, no, no. I mean... the Thingy-ma- BOB.


Well, in that case...

:P

You Can See This One Coming A Mile Away...

We are big Tom Sawyer fans. Action Man and Sports Fan both started out with the Illustrated Classics version, and then graduated on to the real deal. I love the utter boyishness of these books, and even found delightfully old copies of Tom Sawyer Abroad and Tom Sawyer Detective. Action Man enjoyed both of these immensely.

As a result, there have been many Tom Sawyer-ish shennanigans with my boys, although luckily none as hair-raising as those poor Aunt Polly had to deal with.

Imagine my embarrassed cringing, however, when our beloved pediatrician asked Little Love this question at her 4 (almost 5) year check up:

Dr: Now, I know you don't smoke, right?

Little Love: Nope!

Dr: Does anyone in your house smoke?

Little Love: Yes! Action Man does!

Dr: (confused.. looking at me) Really?

Me: No, no...

Little Boo: Yes he does, Mama! In the backyard! He lights his cigars...

Me: (wanting to muzzle Little Boo) Well... it's a homemade one... and he just pretends.... Tom Sawyer, you know?


And luckily, she does know, and understands, and CPS is not out to get me.

*sigh*


:)