Fullness

I hope you do this sometimes, because I sure need to know I am not the only mom-of-many who wonders what it's like to live the other life. You know, the one I specifically did not choose.

I made a run up to the froofy-trendy grocery store up the road yesterday afternoon. I needed some solitude and a few groceries. Froofy-trendy does the trick!
:)

As I drove DH's oldish black economy car, a white BMW whizzed by. And my other self that didn't exist whizzed right along with it.

What would it be like, I wondered....
~to zoom around in my BMW, perfect nails, hair and outfit, ready to take on the world.. or at least my part of it?
~to not have to rush home to accommodate the schedules of 5 little ones and a husband eager to get out and enjoy the day?
~to not have to cook and assemble meals 3 times a day, 7 days a week?
~to go out with my friends, to chat, to spa days (what are those anyway? they sound amazing...) for drinks, to movies, or just to hang out....
~to not have to comparison shop for Bay Leaves, for goodness sake, and just get the $6 Spice Island brand?
~to not have to homeschool? :)

What would there be left, I pondered, once I took away all of my duties? It would all boil down to me.
ME.
ME.
ME.
ME.

And my life would be completely boring and worthless,I decided. And I would become an extremely shallow busy-body. Shallow because there would be nothing worthwhile in my life to care about, and a busy-body because I would be trying in all the wrong ways to care about something. **Disclaimer... I know many wonderful people who are called to live out their sanctification by being single. And they are not selfish in the least. I also know that I would have a much harder time being unselfish if I weren't constantly being forced out of my comfort zone by these little beings who surround me daily and who hold the keys to my heart.

My life is full. There is no getting around that. Every moment of my day is filled with children or dishes or housework or children or dishes.... you get the picture. But as I zipped around the store, pondering prices and reading recipes, my glimpse gained perspective.

There is a very real, very worthwhile reason for everything I do.

The older cars, the comparison shopping, the lack of free time and money for endless shopping trips and spa days, at times even the friendships that have to be put on the back burner because of my duties here at home... all of this is because I am the mother of many little ones. Every sacrifice I make is for them and their comfort. For us, and our home-filled comfort.

My life is not about me. No-one's is. But I am the steward of it, and the helpmate of this little family.




















(Here's Little Love pictured on our walk yesterday to the duck ponds in front of the froofy-trendy monster-houses part of town. Given the choice? Yeah. I'd have chosen the little cutie over the monster house any day)


And that is a fullness I can revel in.

:)