Here.
Here.
Here.
And the one I want to focus on is here.
The one where I remember (so vividly, still!) the picture I have stored in my mind of my ten male cousins, bearing my Grandfather to his final resting place. Their faces, so stern... their backs, so proud. The casket, laden with the American flag. It was a scene of pride and sorrow. I will never forget it.
And now, with the passing of my Grandmother, less than two weeks ago, the story behind the picture has been revealed.
Apparently, the director of the funeral home was in a bit of tizzy regarding the number of pallbearers. He "had words" with my older cousin, fussing over the enormous amount of young men who would be carrying the casket. My older cousin looked him in the eye and told him to "deal with it." In other words, buddy, we all will be sharing this honor. No one will be left out. You have ten pallbearers. Just deal.
And again, when my Grandmother was laid to rest... these same ten young men would carry her, ever-so-gently, to her place beside my Grandfather. Not having been there, I can only imagine the care and love with which they did their duty. Yet once again, the funeral director was forced to stretch his resources in accommodating such a large number of pallbearers. And from what I heard, he wasn't too pleased. He normally doesn't have this many... it isn't the normal protocol....
Which got me thinking.
How many old people, Grandmothers and Grandfathers, die alone? How many are carried to the graveside by strangers? How does this happen? Is it the person's fault? Is it indicative of the lives they have led? Or more indicative of those who were supposed to love them to the end?
And what a witness, to the type of people my Grandparents were. The funeral home was packed at all the viewings, likewise the church for the funeral mass. Their love for each other gave life to a whopping 26 grandchildren... 10 of whom were strapping boys. Boys who grew up to be strong young men. Strong enough to lift the burden of love to it's final rest.
It is something for all of us to think about.... to ponder. When it comes down to it, when it comes to the final end...
When love is all that is left...
Who will lift you up?
5 comments:
Hey....I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I didn't know!
I think this is a neat piece. One never thinks of being "lifted up" in a coffin, but.....there it is.
See you tomorrow, hopefully.
Beautiful, Meg....Yes 10 strapping grandsons...all of them full of love an honor and tremendous admiration for their grandpa and grandma...an amazing witness to the power and strength of family! I know our family is what it is today because of the foundations that were set in place by my and dad's parents and their patents etc. down the line....to carry on that lineage...by the grace of God we will...the power of the Sacrament is alive and well! Your reflection is proof positive! Thank you for your loving words of great wisdom.... love to you....
Yes, I am sorry to hear of your loss as well. But what a beautiful story about the grandsons. When my father passed away, at home, (what he and my mother had hoped for), all nine of their children were present. We were with him for the last 7 days of his life, even sleeping together under the same roof...for old times sake. My father died a very wealthy man in faith.
Meg,
This is a beautiful post, thank you. I'm so sorry for your loss. My Mom 3 weeks ago at 75. I was thinking about this same thing as I watched her 2 sons, her 2 sons in law and her two oldest grandsons (one of whom is my son) bear her body to its final resting place. She was loved so greatly by her family and friends. It baffled me that the funeral home folks were so suprised at the idea that they did not need to provide pallbearers thank you. Where are the families? I don't feel that we are so unusual, loving, close (and ok somewhat disfunctional). Is that so odd in our culture?
What an excellent meditation -- and tribute to your grandparents and your family. Blessings to all of you in the sorrow of their passing -- but kudos to the two souls that left so much love behind.
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